?L: ?Teach him a lesson, I guess.?J: ?Not sure that he?s that smart. Plus there?s that other thing.?L: ?Other thing??J: ?Yeah, you know, our tits.?L: ...Yeah. No matter how I tried to hide them, everyone was always staringat my chest to see if they could figure out how big they were. And theykept telling me how ?pretty? I looked. A real bummer.?J: ?At least here nobody bugs you about how you look.?L: ?And the food?s better than what my Mom cooks???.?And then they wandered off and I couldn?t hear. Finally, after a few minutes I said, “Wow.” We all laughed.What fun it had been, but it was too fast and too hurried. We all knew we wanted more but this time a measured and relaxed enjoyable activity. I suggested we retire to the bedroom where I had a smaller but just as good television that we could watch the movies on.We entered the bedroom and Janice pulled back the covers as I turned on some soft music. Janice suggested that I put on some lingerie and see what that would do for us. I. In my head, I know that you think it’s silly for me to feel like this, but I can’t stop it. I killed that woman. I didn’t know her. I never even looked her in the eye. I ended her life without any of that and I owed her better than that. I can’t ever fix it or go back and do it better and part of me says that I’m so smart that I could have found another way. That tells me that I didn’t want to.” I frowned at my plate. “You’ve all said ‘what else could you have done?’ at one point or another,. Turning in my chair I looked at the door as it opened. Before I could say anything Johnny looked at me with a withering look and asked ‘so what are some full blown faggot now? Don’t even answer me cause I can’t deal with it now. I’m going to crash with the guys next door till I figure this shit out.’ With that he grabbed some clothes and left the room without another word. Fuck, this was going to be bad. The sad part was with all this roommate drama the only thing I could think about was Trey.
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