” Her voice trailed off. She had opened up the subject of sex without reservation, so I followed up without reservation as well by saying, “If you...don’t mind me asking, what about satisfying yourself, privately I mean?” She looked me straight in the eye now. “Well, yes, I’ve tried. But to be honest it just hasn’t worked for me. I don’t know, it’s not what I imagine how things can really be I suppose.” Once again she averted her eyes. “I’m sorry. I guess I’ve said too much now haven’t I?” and. Tell me, does that belief include when the twins were made? Do you regret making them instead of children with other men when you were younger, just because their father is white? What does that say about you, that you wish that you never had your twins, just because they aren’t black?“Don’t make this ugly, young lady! You’ve been brainwashed, plain and simple, and you need to wake the fuck up! You’ve already lost a great husband, but now you’re losing your daughters!” Brian spoke up at. Just a complete silence. Gathering all my senses and with countless butterflies in my stomach I moved ma face closer to her. Her eyes too got wide and wider, her breathing got faster and faster. As I was just about to kiss her, her eyes just got so wide and she took such a deep breath that I got scared and I just got my face to her side and gave her a hug.I could feel her heartbeat on my chest and m sure even she would have felt mine. I took my hand and started caressing her hair while giving. I then had my shower and came down in my pyjamas (it was a hot night).Mom lay on the sofa and I sat in the only armchair as we watched tv.After a while I plucked up courage and told mom that Maria and I planned to get engaged.She leaped from the sofa and came at me, screaming: "No girl is going to have you."She raked her fingernals down my face drawing blood. I grabbed her wrist, forcing her back so that I could stand. She then tried to kick me, so I twisted her round and forced her back.
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