Next, I did what any man would do, I unplugged our house phone and proceeded to get gloriously drunk. The bender I was on was really more of a quest f...r finding relief from the pain I was in over losing Kath, but it was a bust. My bout with bacchanalia lasted through Sunday morning. At that point I ran out of booze and it was good as I felt that I was going to die, physically, spiritually and mentally. I went to bed and fell into a deep sleep only to woken by a pounding somewhere in the house.. . About five years ago I had a heart to heart talk with Sophie. I told her that I don't think she ever forgave me for the affair, that I believe she fell out of love with me and I deserved it. I believe she only stayed with me because of the kids and that our life outside of no sex was pretty good. I still loved her and told her I never had sex with any woman since the affair over twenty years ago. I promised her that I would always be there for her and if she wanted me all she had to do was. " You can keep lying to yourself, but you're not fooling me. You're likea zombie going in and out of yoga. You don't notice the hottest man onearth staring at you openly or the woman with the unnaturally largebreasts behind you. You're not here. Your mind is eternally elsewhere."Nadia didn't say anything. She wished she had more coffee."And that elsewhere," added Joanna, "is called Penny." What? No it isn't." It isn't?" asked Joanna incredulously."I mean, I'm thinking about her, but I'm not. I didn't know we could join in, too. It looks like fun."I was teasing her a little, but only a little.Simone got a look of horror on her face, then got herself under control."Uh, Papa, it's different with Marion. She, uh, well, she's lived here longer and, like, she knows most of these kids and uh, well, um, you know... ?"I would have sworn she was uncomfortable with the thought of my being in that room. I got the distinct impression I wasn't welcome. Imagine!"Well, as long as she isn't.
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